You Have To Let Me Go
by Anonymonimus
Summary: Mikoto never really showed how Tatara's death affected him mostly because he invented a lie to comfort himself and give him an excuse to believe that the latter wasn't truly dead. But, one can not escape reality forever. Fluff, Angst


**So I'm obssessed with Shutter Island (I watched it like 500 times - no joke) and so I decided to use Mikoto and Tatara to re-enact one of my fav scenes xP**

**I guess they might seem OOC but I'm just being realistic here, how would you have acted if you were in the same situation as them?**

**Seriously, feel free to answer that question in a review xD**

**ENJOY**

* * *

Mikoto stumbled forward in a hall from a home that now resided in his memories. Ashes were raining around, covering everything with a torrid black. He could feel the bags under his eyes and buzzing in his head from intoxication. Without remembering when or how long ago, he knew he had taken his fill of hard liquor to help him forget – but forget what?

Suddenly, a man with very feminine features walked in from a room on the right of the corridor slowly being buried in black snow. He was holding a bottle, his gaze accusing but mainly disappointed. "You drank again, didn't you?" Tatara asked. "It's not good to drink so often, you'll get sick."

"I'm…just so sad…" Mikoto mumbled walking forward with hesitant steps. "Are you really…?"

He stretched out his arm to touch the other's soft cheek but, before he could, Tatara left into the living room on the left.

"No."

Mikoto quickly followed, afraid that the man he loved so dearly would disappear if he left him out of his sight for too long. But there Tatara stood, in the middle of the living room, starring out a window with a melancholic look.

"Anna is such a quiet child." Tatara commented as Mikoto ventured closer.

"She still is." Mikoto informed reaching for Tatara again, "Maybe even more now…since you left."

A sad smile tugged at Tatara's lips. "I'm sorry. I never meant for this to happen…" he apologized.

The room in which they were standing slowly began to burn away and cause more ashes to rain to the ground but that was unimportant to Mikoto at the moment. His fingers slowly came in contact with Tatara's soft hair and trailed down his back before Mikoto jerked his hand away. Tatara's back had started to turn to ashes.

Desperate to hide the imminent process of disappearance of Tatara, Mikoto quickly embraced the former, covering his back with his chest and pressing his face in the crook of Tatara's neck. Tatara calmly placed his hands over Mikoto's which were placed over his belly and leaned into his embrace with a sigh of content.

"I know I hurt you…" Tatara mumbled after a moment, "It was because I was careless…you always told me not to be…"

"It's not your fault." Mikoto whispered, "You didn't know he was going to shoot…"

Suddenly, a cold, dense liquid slipped between Mikoto's fingers and, with a quick peak, it was made evident that the fluid was blood.

"Oh god…"

"You still can't let go, hun?" Tatara asked. "You're pretending I'm on a trip or something, aren't you? So you can pretend that I'll eventually come back…"

"I…"

"But you're going to have to let me go, Mikoto." He said as his skin began to take a shade of grey.

More ashes fell from the burning ceiling.

"You're going to have to accept that I'm gone."

"I…I can't…" Mikoto persisted with chocked words.

"You need to," Tatara insisted, "I'm holding you back."

"I don't care."

"But you should." The former stated with a sad smile. "I know it's hard but you need to do it. For everyone, for Anna and yourself."

Speechless, Mikoto buried his face in Tatara's shoulder and gripped onto his frail body even tighter. After a moment he finally managed to choke out:

"I can't."

"You can." Tatara encouraged, "You're a king, and you can do anything."

"I can't bring you back."

"That's why you have to let me go." Tatara insisted as his fingers slowly turned to ashes and fell to the ground. "Let me go Mikoto, I have to go and you need to wake up."

"No."

"You have to."

Mikoto's embrace tightened even more.

"I can't. I don't want to be without you."

"You have to. You have to wake up."

"I don't want to. I'll stay."

Tatara's body suddenly began to crack and turn to ashes. "Mikoto, let me go. You have to let me go…"

Before Mikoto could protest anymore, Tatara turned to ashes completely and fell to the ground. The red haired leader stared emptily at his blood-covered hands not sobbing but mourning Tatara's absence. Tearing his gaze away from the blood, he looked around the burning room and just as he blinked –

* * *

Mikoto awoke, in his bed. The sun was shinning brightly outside and he could faintly hear birds chirping beautifully just next to the window. He was about to sit when he felt a light pressure on his arm which turned out to be Anna who was using him as a pillow.

She slept soundly next to Mikoto who sighed at her calming sight.

Staring at the ceiling, Mikoto thought about his morose dream and about Tatara which was something he never really did because, as previously mentioned, he liked to believe that the latter was just on a trip and would return to him shortly.

_You have to let me go…_

_Perhaps_, Mikoto thought closing his eyes, _it is time…_

* * *

**I dunno guys...**

**I mean, Mikoto never talks about Tatara or even seems to think about him so it makes sense to think that Mikoto is in denial or something like that...**

**Again, I dunno, I just wanted to write something sad xD**

**Did I succeed?**

**THESE GUYS NEED MORE STORIES AND I AM MORE HAPPY THAN TO PROVIDE THEM!**


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